Making the Most of Every Moment: Transforming an Aversion to Acceptance
It's often said that we are the sum total of our thoughts. Every day, our minds are filled with a myriad of ideas, beliefs, and worries which can dictate our actions and shape the outcomes of our lives. From the onslaught of social media to the infinite news cycle, sometimes it’s easy to fall into the doom and gloom cycle, but how much control do we have when it comes to these mental musings?
In recent years, the concept of a “growth mindset” has become increasingly popular as both a psychological paradigm and a daily practice. The idea behind this is that our attitudes—especially towards ourselves and our abilities—have an immense impact on our achievements in life. Those with a growth mindset don’t see limits to what they can do—they are constantly pushing themselves toward growth and self-improvement.
This involves a conscious effort to change from what is known as a “fixed mindset”—the belief that one's capabilities are predetermined—to a growth mindset, in which abilities can be grown through dedication over time. This can feel overwhelming, as many of these thoughts stem from our deep subconscious that was imbued at an early age.
One powerful way to do this is by becoming aware of the language we use when describing experiences or tasks in life. Instead of saying you "have to" do something, reframe it in your brain like, "I'm so glad I get to be challenged by this and try something new." Studies have shown that consciously rephrasing certain issues in this manner can help enhance motivation levels and effectuate greater self-efficacy. This isn’t about living in an exclusively positive mindset, but more about shifting the energetic focus.
Furthermore, it’s important to keep an open mind when taking on challenges - especially those we may find particularly daunting or unpleasant. Oftentimes, dealing with these difficulties head-on is exactly what we need for personal growth. Overcoming resistance allows us to break new ground, both mentally and physically, allowing us to expand our horizons beyond anything we had previously imagined possible.
When approaching obstacles with aversion instead of appreciation for what can be derived from them — such as increased knowledge or improved skill sets — we might miss out on invaluable opportunities for growth and development. Avoiding having a difficult conversation with someone? Take this as an opportunity to work on your communication skills and set boundaries.
As always, this article is meant as a friendly guideline, and not intended as a medical diagnosis. If you seek further help, please seek out a professional.